Tom, Stu & You Podcast

Episode #44 - What is Toxic Masculinity

March 8, 2021

Welcome to Episode #44 where we ask the question; “What is Toxic Masculinity?” Having personal experience with this subject, and recognizing the importance of discussing this topic with others, we were both excited and apprehensive to dive right into such a controversial topic. Masculinity is so tied up in our sense of identity, that it’s hard not to feel personally attacked whenever someone questions our manliness...but that’s kinda the problem in a nutshell. We need to redefine what it means to be a good man, because toxic masculinity affects not only boys & men, but society as a whole. 


Key message: “By far the worst thing we do to males — by making them feel they have to be hard — is that we leave them with very fragile egos.”

— Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, award-winning author


Here are some of the topics we look into throughout this conversation:

  • What is toxic masculinity?
  • Why is it an issue? 
  • Examples of toxic masculinity
  • Personal experiences with toxic masculinity
  • Argument that biology supports gender differences
  • Argument that gender is a social construct 
  • Capitalism and toxic masculinity
  • Even if there were biological differences, shouldn’t we want to create a more equal world?
  • How does socialization impact toxic masculinity?
  • Why the term toxic is triggering and using mindful masculinity instead


We know this is a difficult conversation to have. It’s hard to come to terms with our own self-identity, and when we question what makes us ‘a real man,’ it can be hard to put into words our feelings & values. That’s why we need to have this conversation though, because it’s hard is exactly why it’s so important. 


Like us on Facebook, YouTube, Twitter and Instagram @tomstuandyou or send us an email at with any questions, comments, thoughts, or queries you have on the topics we’ve discussed or any suggestions of topics you’d like to hear us address. 


Check out our website for a full list of our episodes & guests, as well as further resources we recommend on some of the topics we regularly discuss. 


Thanks so much for your support! 

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